Hemlocked Heart

Distant seashells and sand scapes
Saturated my salty perception of you.
Shrouded in love, desire, steadfast will,
Waited a serene, pure, determined blue.

I unwittingly embellished on iridescent perfection
Longing for self serving confidence and pride
Spiraled in circles, I’d lost my caring self
To the stoic forces that seamlessly divide.

The waves of disgust, hatred and loathing
You perpetually wage war against
Have become my soulless brothers,
Naturally locked in demented step.

They guide me, nurture me, incubate
Within what is left of me, never to be free
A drowning dove in a ocean of insecurity
Infecting sheltered harbors you once made for me

So much so that I have forgotten yet again
Your scent carried on the wind’s current
Your gaze fixed with kindness and grit
Your whisper that changes my broken mindset

As tides turn I whimper and stumble
Away from my stubborn self made doom.
For the fog, I couldn’t see it yesterday,
but I desperately, deeply need you.